Really touching speech.

Few minutes ago, i followed the president's speech on our national TV station. It was a really touching speech for me. Since the first time i saw his face expression, it was clear that he's in a deep sad and great anger for the situation. I have to make it clear here, i have nothing to do with political issues of the election. I have to intention to, let's say, give credits to SBY for his candidacy or whatever. I just really appealed by the speech of my country's president.

In the speech, he used several obvious emotionally touching words (at least for me) as a citizen. He used the word "Saya bersumpah.." ("I swear..") instead of "Saya berjanji.." ("I promise.."), for the nation's law enforcement entities to find, catch, and justify be suspect, planner and the brain of this terror. Furthermore, he also stopped at least twice, with silent, and can't resist his feeling and sorry about the bombing.

This time, he made it very obvious about intelligent facts and findings. He showed photos showing some terrorist activity train to shoot with his photo as the target. He also informed some detail intelligent infos, about people want to sabotage the result of the election, people don't want to see him again in the office, people who would declare a revolution and also people wanting Indonesia to be like Iran after the election. He made it very obvious this time. Maybe it was expressions of as i said, deep sad and great anger.

Coming to the end of the speech, he cited about the cancellation of Manchester United match. Moreover, he explained that this terror has teared down our improving living condition. The bombing just shattered the international trust towards the nation's economy and security stability. He also cursed the people involved on this bombing. He mentioned few people involved in several past crimes who are not being caught, yet, that will laugh in their heart about this bombing.

Finally, he declare using the phrase "Saya akan berada di depan.." ("I will be in the front..") in order to, again, to stabilize the country condition. He asking Indonesian Citizen to not giving up to the threats of terrorism. We have to fighting it together and giving our best contribution to the never ending country's development.

Today, i really felt that i've called as a citizen by my president's speech. I've called to being more concern about my nation's condition and should give my best to it. We have to realize that act of terrorism could affect our daily life on a very sudden. I recalled my close family members, relatives and friends, whose in their daily activity are highly possible to go and pass those terrorist target place. Even me, myself, are often visit places that are very strategic for terrorist attack. They are nearby. The president also made a point that, "Tidak ada satu bangsa dan agama pun yang membenarkan aksi terror.." ("There's no nation and religion on earth that allowing the acts of terror..")

My message is, as the citizen we should unite to improve our country's condition. Fear nothing, except God. As the president said, "Dengan ridho Tuhan yang Maha Kuasa, Alloh SWT.." ("With the bless of God, Alloh SWT..") we can face and go through this harsh time to make it better in the future.

For one more time.

There's a dead body without head and feet on the Ritz-Carlton Hotel's explosion spot. I just woke up this morning after my friend send me a message that there's accident in Mega Kuningan, Jakarta. I turn on my TV and try to follow what happened. I don't want to fabricate news in order to exaggerate things or spread the words of panic. All i want to show is my very deep sympathy to all victims of this nasty deed.

credit to detik.com

Yet, it is confirmed that this explosion is an act of bombing. Since the dead body without head and feet is assumed by the local police as an evidence of high explosive suicide bombing act. Then, easily say it is an act of terrorism. For one more forsaken time, after Bali one and two, Australian Embassy, previous Mariott, my beloved homeland, Indonesia, has to suffer for terror. This morning, a series of explosion occurred in three different place across the city. One in Ritz-Carlton Hotel, the other in JW Mariott , and the other one is a car explosion in Muara Angke.

It is a sad, and i feel really sorry for it. As a citizen i've been hurt by people trying to hurt my country. While most people are relatively living on stable condition after the general election, there are people trying to disturb the peace of our living. Although i prefer to just see it as a humanitarian tragedy, somehow i figure out why these bombers trying to disturb the peace of living in Indonesia politically. It is obvious that Indonesia has a huge potential as a country. The biggest Muslim country in the world, the fifth most populous country on earth, and the thirteenth biggest economy existing. These facts lead me to why i assume Indonesia is a nice target for those nasty act of terrorism. Moreover, there are some people out there who just will never be happy to see this country living on peace and harmony.

What i want to say is that, once again, my deep sympathy to the victims. And also my concern to my country's condition. This post is have nothing to help the current situation. But maybe this is my way to show that, i care.

New Year's Obstacle.

Awal tahun, baru berapa hari. Liburan ga ada kerjaan, nilai kuliah baru pada keluar. Gue ga lulus dua mata kuliah ! Pengen memaki, tapi tampaknya ga ngaruh juga.. jadi yaudahlah.

Kambing.

Hahaha. itu aja deh makiannya.. Rada gondok juga sih, tapi ini yang namanya hidup. kalo ga ada swing nya ga seru. ada diatas ada dibawah. yang penting tetep semangat. Kalo soal kuliah mah, cuma ada satu kalimat :

I should go on time. No matter what it takes.

Galau

Mungkin saya masih terlalu muda untuk berbicara tentang hidup
Tapi saya rasa tidak ada salahnya
Sekedar berkeluh kesah dan mencurahkan sedikit kegundahan tentang nya.

Kadang hidup menunutut kedewasaan yang diatas batas usia kita.
Menuntut kematangan berfikir dan bertindak yang diluar jangkauan kita.

Itu semua jelas tidak mudah.
Pada kenyataannya ini jelas tak semudah seperti yang para dewasa tuturkan dalam nasehat-nasehatnya.
Konon, kebijaksanaan bersikap lahir dari suatu keprihatinan.
Katanya, kita harus arif dalam menyikapi proses kehidupan.
Tapi terkadang, keimanan hanya muncul pada saat ada rasa ketakutan dan kegundahan semata.
Ini memalukan. Tapi saya pun melakukan.
Manusia hanya mencari Tuhan nya disaat sulit. Saat hidup sudah terjepit.

Sering kali hidup menuntut sesuatu diatas kemampuan kita,
Tapi tak apa.
Kalau tidak begitu, bukan hidup namanya.
Menurut saya, ini adalah kontemplasi seni berfikir, bersikap dan bertindak.

Ketakutan,
Kegalauan,
Kegelisahan,
Pasti ada.
Tapi saya percaya,
Tuhan pasti akan beri jawaban.

--
ditulis atas nama kumpulan kegundahan seorang pria muda,
Jakarta 30 desember 2008.

November 7th.

Friday, November 7^th 2008.

It’s already almost 12 in the middle of the night. The day has almost changed into Saturday.

I am on my feet walking alone from Margonda Residences on Jalan Margonda Raya to FEUI. Do you know what does it takes to walk alone in the middle of the night (23:58) at UI Campus Depok ? With those criminal scenes occurred lately on my campus; including rape and homicide, it takes Guts.

What a day. I had a long, tiring, and somehow quite weird 24 hours. I knew that today, November 7^th , is my birthday. But it’s not a big deal for me.

For me, there’s nothing special. No birthday cake; since I’m already 19. No early morning call; except from my beloved mother. And of course, no surprise party; I found it boring.

The thing that so special for me is the thing I did alongside on my birthday for someone else. Besides me, today, there are several friends of mine who also celebrate a birthday on this particular date. One of those friend, is seems like rather special for me. And I dedicated myself to celebrate her birthday even more special than I celebrating my own birthday. I wish a joy, cheers, and full happiness for her.

I am being the road warrior today. I drove my cousin’s tiny-but-loyal Hyundai Atoz. Radio is the only way to killing the silence along the way.

Two strawberry cheese cakes.

A long drive : Cempaka Putih – Kelapa Gading – Jatibening – Depok – Wijaya – Depok.

A typically lavish sweet seventeenth birthday bash of a teenage girl.

And last but not least. The only way I celebrate my own birthday:

A glass of cheap 2005 Australian Shiraz.

Happy Birthday ! I wish you will have a wonderful life journey ahead. Enjoy your birthday, girl. And just enjoy every moment of being a seventeen. ;)

A Quality "Me Time".

After a whole thrilling week for the mid term exam last week, i finally went to my sanctuary of time. Totally fucked up by another bloody core subject, which are Cost Accounting and Corporate Finance, reminded me with those harsh time struggling with Math for Economics on my first semester.

Last Friday, after i put my exam paper on the examiner's desk, i walked outside the classroom with a deep breath wondering "will i survive this semester ?". Exhausted by a rigorous full week exams, i realized that i totally need a getaway. I started out by coaching a tee ball baseball team on Turnamen Pelajar at the afternoon. This time, the payoff was above average for me. I earned almost a hundred thousand rupiah in only about two hours. Then, at the evening, i went to European Movie Festival, watched a Turkish movie with Agis at Erasmus Huis. I found it really interesting. Typically watching movies at a movie festival; free ticket, hard seats, small-but-intimate auditorium, and of course, standing applause at the end of the movie. The unique experience that you will never get at 21 Cineplex, for sure.

It is still not enough yet. On Sunday, i am being informed that my high school team will join a local high school tournament, and i was assigned to handle a team. Which means, another getaway for a whole week. ;P. I spent almost of my days this week by woke up a bit late, went to the ballpark coaching a game at the afternoon, and end up in plaza senayan or grand indonesia looking for books and movies. For me, it was just wonderful. Spending lot of time alone, which my ex-girlfriend called as a quality "me time". Scootering aroung the bustling city of Jakarta, struggling with the rush-hour traffic jam during a evening pouring rain. Tired ? Hell yes. Enjoy ? Definitely.

For me, there's nothing wrong with watching a movie alone. Enjoying a cup of coffee while grasp some J.Co Donuts at the corner of the store. Spending hours go-around Kinokuniya looking for books. It's fine to be alone; for a little while. Taking a short break of your routines and enjoy myself.

Although today i feel that i suffering for colds, it's just fine. Physically exhausted, but mentally fresh. I am looking forward for tomorrow schedule. Entrepreneurship class in the morning, commitee meeting after that, followed by my high school's softball team Final game in the afternoon, and hopefully will end up with few glasses of fine-and-cheap red wine. ;D

Spend times alone and enjoy yourself, generate a better understanding about yourself.

What I Just Thought.

I just watched the Michelle Obama Opening Key Address at Democratic National Convention in Denver on YouTube few minutes ago. Before suddenly I realized that her speech just gave me full inspiration about life. She opened up her speech by sharing her childhood story as a girl born and raised by struggling parent in southern Chicago. Her father worked for the city’s water plantation and her mom should stay at home to taken care of her and her older brother. She told so many important points of her life that she believed millions of other Americans also share the common sense and undergo the same experience of challenging life as her family did. She encourages the importance of having a dream and never let it down. Believe it or not, I cry my tears of admiration. This is the best political speech I ever heard from a nation’s first lady candidate. So close, touchy, and soulful.

I will no longer talking about her speech on this blog post. A point that I emphasized from her speech for myself is the common sense of family. How she define the word “Family”, as a sacred word of human being. How important the family is for her. She put all of her efforts to improve and taken care of not only her family, but also her society. The real meaning of “Giving Back” to the community we lived in. The point is the reality that she found in American middle class workers’ real life.

Those things just scramble my mind. I go deeper on defining the real meaning of “success”. I’ve been dreaming to be a successful entrepreneur for years. In the last few years, I’ve been so compassionate to the thing that people called as wealthy. Thinking about having my own company, being my own boss, make some money and earn some wealth. Besides also keep my idealism to create new working field to the others. I think it is just great idea of an 18-years old boy. Nothing’s wrong with my dream. Even some people think that, this is a brilliant idea of a future successful person. In the last few years, I am mostly thinking and dreaming to be a successful young entrepreneur. Sounds glamorous and glorious isn’t it ? Young, Independent, and Wealthy. What a great combination of success.

Then suddenly after I watched her speech, my dream and idealism about those glorious and glamorous life goals are just changed. She changed the way I define the word of success. She opened my eyes for the real thing that I should looking for in my life.

I am a second year student in one of the best economics faculty in the country. And fortunately enrolled as a student in one of the best university in the region. I studied Accounting, Economics, Business, Management, etc. and majoring in Economics and Business. Seems like I already started to undergo the path of my life plan. I think that I already have a clear vision about my life and my future. Until suddenly this afternoon, I decided to add a fundamental aspect of my life plan. Like planning to grow a tree, maybe I already imagine how the leaves and the branches would be. But I somehow forgot to think and imagine how the roots would like. I made a great planning of growing the leaves and branches of my tree, with ignoring the basic concept of the roots. The thing that will remains, whatever the tree is going to be.

I just realized the ultimate goal of my life is to be a full family man. To be a serving son for my parents, a nice brother for my siblings, a good husband for my wife and finally to be a great father for my child. I should be a real family man. There are tough consequences to be a successful person, in terms of career and business. It requires you to give your full efforts, focus, time and energy to deal with it. I knew it for sure, since I was a little child. Since my father is an entrepreneur. But the thing is, I no longer think that being such successful person in terms of business and career as my life goal.

I don’t want to be somewhere else during my business trip, by the time my son or daughter get sick and has to see the doctor at the hospital. I don’t want to let my driver to drive my son and daughter to school every morning, just because i am still sleeping after overnight work. I don’t want to say happy birthday to my children and wife by a phone call just because I have to travel to somewhere around the globe to attend company meetings. I don’t want someone asking where I am on the day of my parent funeral, just because I have to sign a business deal with my buyers on the other continent. I want to be the person that could be alongside my parents at the last time of their life, before they pass away.

I want to do all those family matters by my self. I would like to prove them that I am deserve to be called as a son, husband, and father, by those persons I love most in my life.